Being Present

You ever find yourself in a situation where something really upset you, or you just got bad news and you feel an instant anxiety, fear, or worry? Perhaps you are dreading an upcoming event whatever it may be and you just can’t think or almost feel like you are out of breath. Anxiety can happen out of nowhere, with or without triggers actaully but there are ways to help pull out of some of these moments.

Understand that in these anxious moments, your thoughts are stuck in a forward motion where it doesn’t need to be. Most the time when people worry or have a fear they are thinking of what may happen, what could happen. Your mind just races to the worst things possible making matters worse, and it’s taking you out of reality. All the if and or butts are literally messing with your head!

In these kinds of moments the best thing for anyone to do is take a deep breath, and literally tell yourself to ” Breath In, Breath Out.” The simple most basic thing your body almost does without thought,  breathing,  will bring you right back to the present moment. Repeat to yourself, either outloud or in your head, ” I am breathing in, I am breathing out.”  as you are, breathing in and out. Do this until you feel your breathing has slowed down. Feel free to close your eyes or focus on one thing in front of you, just concentrate on the very motion and feeling of breathing, the air filling, and then leaving your lungs.

Once your breathing slows down take in another thing around you. What are you standing on? Grass? Concrete? Carpet? Take it in and say, ” I am standing on carpet.” How does it feel? Is it soft? Hard, bumpy ? ” The carpet feels very soft under my feet.”

Move to the next thing around you. What does the air feel like? Cold? Warm? Breezy? Is the sun hitting your skin ? ” I can feel the breeze against my skin.” Really focus on how the breeze it touching your skin, does it raise goosebumps? Is it warm? Does the air have a scent to it? Take that in as well.

What else is around you? Focus on anything, perhaps you are in a kitchen. ”  I am standing infront of a stove.” or ” There are white paper towels before me.” You can focus on colors, ” I can see red, I can see blue. There are different shades of blue.” Slowly say these things in your head, one at a time. This is very important, don’t say ” I can see all the colors in teh rainbow, I see everything in the kitchen.” No, slow down and focus on one item, one color, one sense, one by one.

It may sound almost like you’re repeating kindergarten sentences, but the thing you are doing – is bringing your thoughts back to the very moment in which you are in, what is immediately around you.  Instead of going at full speed ahead with worry about something that isn’t even happening at all, you are able to calmly realize you are OK in this very moment, and one by one you are taking in those senses, what is real.

At this point you can calmly go back to whatever triggered your anxiety to start with, and tell yourself, it’s not real. It is not happening, and you don’t have to fear it. This mindfulness meditation method was extremely helpful when I had to go to court the last few years as I tried to get away from my ex and all of his harassment. It was stressful and gave me anxiety but when I did the mindfulness exercise I was able to refocus and calmly take each moment as it came. I have taught my kids this as well, it does take some practice but once you begin it’s extremely helpful. You also get better at it, the more you do it, the more it clicks when you need it.

With kids, you can guide them through the questions, having them answer either outloud or to themselves and you will slowly see them calm down .

You can use this mindfulness mediation method anywhere , anytime and you don’t have to be one with anxiety you can simply do it on a busy, stressful day. You will feel a lot better 🙂